A SPECIAL FAMILY

By Hon Alderman Glynn W Davies-Dear.

To introduce myself, purely to show from where comes this tribute: I am Glynn William Davies-Dear. Born of an English father and a Welsh mother, in Merthyr Tydfil, South Wales and fiercely Welsh. I grew up poised between my Wales & my father’s home in sleepy rural Bedfordshire, England. I served, for three years, in the newly-formed Royal Corps of Transport. This was a time of relative peace: Malaysia was finished, Aden slowing down, Ireland not yet started, so my time was spent entirely in officer training. “Playing cowboys & Indians” as I thought it. Foolishly, I suppose, I resigned & sought a life in Civvy Street. If one is allowed a regret, I suppose that counts as mine.

Eventually I moved my family down South to Hampshire & here I at last found my calling; I discovered politics, duly serving my home borough of Eastleigh for thirty years as a Councillor at all levels: Parish, Borough & County. And ten years as caseworker for our MP. And served a term as Eastleigh Mayor.

And it was in my Councillor role that I first met a charismatic former Gurkha, Kamal Bahadur Purja and his extended family. Instant friendship followed and in time I became accepted, to my intense gratification as an honorary brother by him and his siblings and as a son by his wonderful parents.

The Purja family headed by Nanda Bahadur Purja & Purna Kumari Purja, originally from Dana, Myagdi District, in the foothills of the Himalayas, must be seen as a remarkably talented and quite possibly unique family.
Father, Nanda Bahadur served as a Gurkha in the Indian Army rising to the rank of Hawalder Major (WO2). Mother, Purna Kumari, while raising five children: a daughter and four sons, most of the time on her own while her husband was in India with his Regiment, served the community as a village civic leader, first in Dana and then in Ramnagar in the Chitwan in the South of Nepal.

Everyone knows how very exceptional it is to be accepted into the UK Brigade of Gurkhas. How very few of the tens of thousands who apply each year are chosen: often fewer than a hundred, some years as few as thirty. But how exceptional is it, then, that three sons of one family should succeed. This has to be truly rare indeed, perhaps unique. But First Ganga, then Kamal and then the youngest brother Nirmal each made it.

Jit, the second oldest, missed out only because he was a half inch below the mandatory height standard. A cruel blow for him but a common enough experience for most of the young men seeking acceptance each year. Jit turned to a career in teaching in his village school. An honourable profession but no consolation for his disappointment. Jit must feel cursed by the Gods; he invested his savings and pension in a small workshop turning out concrete building blocks only to have it all swept away by a monsoon earth slide. Again, a common enough fate in the mountain regions of Nepal, but why should Jit have had to so graphically illustrate this experience of so many of his fellow Nepalese?

Ganga, the eldest brother, did well in the Gurkhas, reaching the rank of Lance Corporal. He was renowned for his sporting achievements including representing the Brigade in the gruelling run up Mt. Kinabalu, at 4095m, the highest mountain in Malaysia. Retired, he brought his family from Nepal to settle in the UK: Yo Maya, his wife, his three sons, Ramu, Bimal and Prem and his daughter Priya. Ramu has joined the British Army, gaining exceptional grades in his initial training and continues to excel in his chosen career, he is now a full corporal, husband and father. Bimal graduated with a university degree: he has joined his uncle, Nirmal in the Nimsdai Foundation, a world renowned charitable concern Nirmal has founded, and is regarded as pivotal to the good management of that, and now his younger brother, Prem, has joined the team. More of Nirmal later. Priya, is now at university studying to take up her chosen career as a veterinary nurse.

Kamal was doing well in the 1st/2nd Gurkha Rifles until a severe injury in training ended his active service. In his last years in the Army he was seconded to the Gurkha Museum, Winchester where he is fondly remembered for his excellent, enthusiastic service. He is now retired invalided but has worked self-employed as a Nepalese/English interpreter. He has thrown himself into voluntary service to the community. His work for the Nepalese community is gratefully admired wherever Nepalese have settled in the UK and, indeed, beyond, particularly through his service with the Myagdi Overseas Organisation, MOUK.

Kamal was the joint founder of Maddhat Shamuha (Nepalese Help) in Hart and Rushmoor. A very successful self-help institution serving mid & North Hampshire and highly regarded by local Government and the Charity Commission. He joint-founded Eastleigh Gurkha Nepalese Association (EGNA) in his adopted town, Eastleigh, a thriving and growing association dedicated to support of the Nepalese community and successful integration in Eastleigh’s wider community. Now a registered charity. He founded the Friendly Brothers Dana Sherophero Community UK for fellow emigrated former residents of his birth village of Dana, founded the Intake November 2/1989, the support organisation of his Army Intake for which he served a term as its’ Chairman. He was a Founder Member of MOUK, the UK arm of a the Myagdi Overseas Organisation, a registered charity centred on the Nepalese District of Myagdi but operating wherever Myagdi people have settled, to promote Nepalese culture and wellbeing of their birthplace and of Myagdelis throughout the World and has served a term as its’ President. A prime example of its’ work was the purchase of three off-road ambulances to serve this community at a time when hardly a road had been built and an injured or ill resident had to be carried the miles to a medical facility. Kamal has been recognised by the award of the Golden Jubilee Award for Voluntary Service by Groups in the Community 2012, Hampshire County Council Good Neighbour Awards 2012/13, the High Sheriff of Hampshire Community Award.

Kamal settled in Eastleigh when he was finally dismissed, disabled from the army. He married Shanti Pun & they are now the proud parents of two beautiful and talented daughters, Shostika & Shreyasi and a fine young son Kusal. Kamal was, in fact, the first former Gurkha to move to my town and such is his reputation and standing in the Nepalese community in UK that increasing numbers of Nepalese have moved here and found a welcome in the community, not least due to the determination of EGNA to work with Local Government and the Voluntary Sector to contribute to our community.

Anita, the daughter, went to university in Kathmandu to study nursing. She achieved her BA (Batchelor of Arts) in Nursing and became a lecturer in Nursing in the Nursing College in the city of Biratnagar. She was awarded the highest award in nursing in Nepal, the Biddhya Padak.

Anita has married the delightful Besh Phagami and they have emigrated to live in Australia. We are so very proud of her. Australia will benefit greatly from their residence there.

The three brothers with their families have all become citizens of my Borough of Eastleigh and Nirmal accorded Citizen of Honour status. This is a family of high achievers, outstanding by any standards. I am very glad that the three brothers and their families have all accepted citizenship of my Eastleigh Borough, Nirmal accorded Citizen of Honour for his achievements. He has my unreserved admiration and respect.

Nirmal Purja (NIMSDAI)

We come, finally, to the youngest brother Nirmal. He is known now throughout the world as Nimsdai. He has achieved the most extraordinary things in his relatively short life so far.

Nirmal entered the Brigade of Gurkhas in 2003 but after some four years with the Gurkha Engineers, his thirst for challenge and adventure drew him to the British Special Services. He gravitated to the Special Boat Service (SBS) of the Royal Navy. The first Gurkha to do so. He qualified and served with this elite service, and even qualified as a submarine pilot. Yet another mark of the exceptional qualities of the children of this remarkable family.

Then, in his spare time, he took to mountaineering, especially in the Himalayas. He married his wife Suchie in 2009 and later they moved to live in Eastleigh with his brothers. He is now the proud father of the beautiful daughter, Himani. Unbelievably, the first time he climbed Mt Everest, he climbed it accompanied by just one, totally inexperienced Sherpa. Descending from the summit alone, his Sherpa having descended earlier, Nirmal rescued an exhausted woman climber, abandoned and left to die on the mountain at risk to his own life.
He was later to lead expeditions to climb the mountain: first a group of Marines and then a group of Gurkhas. His exploits thus far earned him the award by HM Queen Elizabeth of the MBE.

Nirmal then retired from the Services, forgoing his entitlement to a pension in order to set up his own adventure climbing business in Nepal. He has achieved World-Wide acclaim by envisaging and accomplishing the extraordinary feat of smashing the established climbing record for the 14 highest peaks in the world, all in the Himalayas, all over 8,000m high: the dread “Death Zone” of mountains. The record stood at 8 years 11months, but Nirmal, with the support of his hand-picked team, completed the feat in just 6 months 6 days. Nirmal named this ‘Project Possible’ and one of his avowed aims was to prove the truth of what he had always believed and that was that anything is possible for man to achieve given belief and determination.

It has to be said, that there were members of the family terribly worried over Project Possible. His brothers, loving him, frankly, feared for his life. I was one of them. We knew the truth that the Himalayas take a terrible tole on those attempting them. Deaths occur not just sometimes but regularly. 8,000m is not called the Death Zone for nothing. I worried, additionally, that Nims had taken on fearful debts that could not be covered by promised pledges if he were to die on the mountain and thus fail in his record attempt. All our fears were aspects solely of our love for him. But Nims was proved right and we were, thankfully, proved wrong.

You can read the full story of this amazing adventure and indeed of his life to date, in his book, “Beyond Possible, One soldier, fourteen peaks. My life in the Death Zone”.

He has, since, further amazed the mountaineering world by climbing K2 again, but this time leading his team to conquer this most formidable and second highest mountain, in Winter. The one Himalayan peak never before reached in winter. Nirmal, alone in the group, and perhaps in response to a challenge made, did this without the aid of oxygen. He has recently set a further record by climbing all fourteen peaks without oxygen.

There is a driving force that takes Nirmal. Some might say a devil that drives him on. But if it is a devil, it is of a strangely beneficent sort. He just has a belief in the capabilities of man and a mission to demonstrate what determination and self-belief can achieve. For Nirmal, it has not been enough to climb the highest peaks; his gaze has gone higher than the mountains. He has made it his life’s work to force recognition, respect and decent remuneration for the Sherpa people, without whom the mountains could not be conquered and sadly lacking in the past. And the registered charity, the Nimsdai Foundation he has created has already amassed a great record of financial support for the needy and especially youth here in Britain, in Nepal of course and elsewhere.

And that is what I most admire in him. He has my unreserved admiration and respect.
Nirmal would readily agree that his achievements are built on a foundation of the inspired example of his revered parents and of his siblings: this very special family. Nirmal is an exceptional man, a giant, but the well-known truism of standing on the shoulders of giants is true in this exceptional family.

But there is a darker side to glory: to Nirmal’s achievements, which must be examined.
We have a saying, arising, I suppose, from the trenches of WW1, Western Front. “If you stick your head above the parapet, someone is sure to take a shot at you.” Meaning, of course, be careful in standing out from the crowd for arousing the jealousy of lesser mortals. And of late there are lesser members of the climbing fraternity who have taken every opportunity to take potshots at Nimsdai. It is common enough: if you can believe an idol has feet of clay then it makes your lack of achievement less hurtful to you.

I had always imagined that there was a common sense of honour and mutual respect among climbers. Alas I am sadly disillusioned in this. I expect no-one attacks Nimsdai to his face but there has been, and continues to be, a multi-headed campaign, in the media, of inuendo, denigration and outright slander aimed at him. Intended, I suspect, to damage his reputation and the market for his Kathmandu & UK based adventure business & even to the Nimsdai Foundation.

I am sorry to say, this sorry behaviour is only to be expected in this day and age. I leave the details of this sordid story, only to say that if there were validity to some of the “mud” thrown, I would have thought that running off to the newspapers & social media rather than taking more dignified action speaks more to the character and motivation of the accusers and critics than anything.

I am confident that Nirmal already has risen above all this. I am equally confident that he has done more than enough through his achievements and especially his championing of the Sherpa community to secure the respect of the more respectable members of the World’s climbing community.